Pothos

This is fantastic

2010-03-17T09:45:00.001-07:00

12. The Departed (2006)

2010-02-25T14:04:00.000-08:00

The best movie Martin Scorsese and Leonardo DiCaprio have ever done, together or separately, and the only remake to make my list.

13. Atonement (2007)

2010-02-25T10:31:00.001-08:00

An amazing adaptation of a book that everyone said couldn't be adapted.

Brilliant direction, a brilliant script, and one of the best and most powerful endings to a film ever put on screen.

Remember Me

2010-02-25T10:27:00.001-08:00

Is it just me, or does this trailer look surprisingly good?

14. Children of Men (2006)

2010-02-25T10:23:00.000-08:00

A masterful post-apocalyptic movie from a director who proves he can do anything. A brilliant fusion of art and storytelling in a commercial movie.

15. Brokeback Mountain (2005)

2010-02-25T10:22:00.001-08:00

Yes, it's "that gay cowboy movie."

It's also the best re-telling of Romeo and Juliet that's come around in a long time.

16. City of God (2002)

2010-02-25T09:59:00.000-08:00

One of the most influential movies of the decade, and one of the best. It's a remarkable true story that will stay with you for a long, long time.

As Roger Ebert puts it... "One of the best movies you'll ever see."

17. Finding Neverland (2004)

2010-02-25T09:43:00.000-08:00

It's schmaltzy, yes. And sentimental. And unbelievably restrained, and well-paced and nuanced...

And the ending alone put it on this list.

The Frenchies strike again!

2010-02-25T09:19:00.000-08:00

...With their awesome new no-smoking advertisement which is supposed to combat teen smoking by comparing it to blow jobs! And not just any type of blow jobs, we're talking some serious pedophililia with kids blowing adults!

I guess (according to the Frenchies) the common theme among the two (smoking and blow jobs) is "dependency" and "submission."

Hmmm, I get the submission part, but... since when were blowjobs addictive?

This is awesome

2010-01-25T14:08:00.001-08:00

And because I love the Top 40 so much...

2010-01-21T16:32:00.000-08:00

DJ Earworm's annual United States of Pop, 2009 edition.

18. Casino Royale (2006)

2010-01-21T16:25:00.000-08:00

There's a good chance that the Bond reboot might be the coolest movie of the decade.

And I'm seriously in love with Eva Green.

19. Batman Begins (2005)

2010-01-15T11:24:00.000-08:00

Don't let anyone fool you - this movie is even better than the sequel. I can forgive the hokey ending as this might be the best super hero movie ever made, and it's definitely the decade's best franchise reboot.

A perfect combination of spectacle and character beats, this is the new prototype for a successful studio tentpole that ushered in the trend of bringing character directors on for huge studio movies.

And Christian Bale is the fucking man.

20. 8 Mile (2002)

2010-01-12T12:25:00.000-08:00

As soon as you've stopped laughing, go back and watch it again. Seriously. It's that good. And Eminem's anthem "Lose Yourself" pretty much defined rap for the entire decade.

Who ever thought in 1999 we'd be saying Eminem, Academy Award winner?

Honorable Mention: Cold Moutain (2003)

2010-01-11T10:32:00.001-08:00

This one just barely misses the list.

One of the most haunting, and affecting movies about war ever made. It reminds us just how far we've come this decade: Jude Law used to be a movie star, Nicole Kidman wasn't always box office poison, and Renee Zellweger won an Oscar.

A lot can happen in six years.

My Top 20 Movies of the Decade

2010-01-11T10:20:00.000-08:00

And after a prolonged absence from my blog, I'm returning... with a countdown. A list to be more exact.

Over the next month or so I'll post (one a day) my top 20 films of the decade.

You're welcome.

And without further ado, let the list begin...

LEAP YEAR in theaters now!

2010-01-11T10:18:00.001-08:00

Go see it, it's awesome! Seriously.

And I'm in it, which is cool.

America America by Ethan Canin

2009-11-30T19:25:00.000-08:00

So anyone looking for a good read, I would definitely recommend this book. It's one of the most subtle and affecting American tragedies I've ever read - an updating and reimagining of F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby with a contemporized take on the American dream and how our country's changed.

It shows our America as it was, what made it great, and it shows America as it is now, and asks the question, have we lost something, or has it merely changed? Things have definitely changed - of that there's no questions - but the novel leaves the reader to decide whether or not they've changed for the better.

America America is the rare case where a story told by a passive and unreliable narrator is both visceral and gripping and real, it's one of the finest American epics we've had, tracing a great American family of the sort we don't have anymore and a town the likes of which is altogether much too rare.

It's written in the tradition of men like Faulkner, but America America is more beautiful, and more elegant, and more drawn out.

As Richard Russo wrote, "Read this novel and weep not just for all that we've lost, but how we've lost it."

LEAP YEAR TRAILER!!!

2009-11-12T17:03:00.000-08:00

Everyone check out the trailer and go see the movie January 8th! It's awesome, but more awesome than that you can see my cameo!!!

David Beckham's kids are cooler than all of us

2009-11-02T13:47:00.000-08:00

I don't really give a shit about "Posh's new look," but I'm pretty sure David Beckham's kids are about ten times cooler than me. And they look like they're about 8.

Oscar...?

2009-10-28T09:40:00.000-07:00

These Things I Wish For You by Paul Harvey

2009-10-16T18:45:00.000-07:00

We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse. For my grandchildren, I'd like better. I'd really like for them to know about hand-me-down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I really would.

My cherished grandson, I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated. I hope you learn to make your bed and mow the lawn and wash the car. And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen. I hope you have a job by then.

It will be good if at least one time you can see a baby calf born and your old dog put to sleep. I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in. I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother. And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him. When you want to see a Disney movie and your little brother wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him.

I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely. On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope your driver doesn't have to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your mom.

If you want a slingshot, I hope your dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one, I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books. When you learn to use those newfangled computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.

I hope you get razzed by your friends when you have your first crush on a girl, and when you talk back to your mother, that you learn what ivory soap tastes like.

May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole. I hope you get sick when someone blows cigar smoke in your face. I don't care if your try beer once, but I hope you don't like it. And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.

I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your grandpa and go fishing with your uncle. May you feel sorrow at a funeral and the joy of holidays.
I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through a neighbour's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Christmas time when you give her a plaster of Paris mould of your hand.

These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness.

Eastbound and Down

2009-10-12T09:12:00.000-07:00

"I'm not racist, I just love America more than any other country. I remember when that used to be called Patriotism."

Literary Quote of the day...

2009-09-17T15:47:00.000-07:00

"As he watched Joe stand, blazing, on the fire escape, Sammy felt an ache in his chest that turned out to be, as so often occurs when memory and desire conjoin with a transient effect of weather, the pang of creation. The desire he felt, watching Joe, was unquestionably physical, but in the sense that Sammy wanted to inhabit the body of his cousin, not possess it. It was, in part, a longing--common enough among the inventors of heroes--to be someone else; to be more than the result of two hundred regimens and scenarios and self-improvement campaigns that always ran afoul of his perennial inability to locate an actual self to be improved. Joe Kavalier had an air of competence, of faith in his own abilities, that Sammy, by means of constant effort over the whole of his life, had finally learned only to fake. "

-The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay

2009-09-14T19:43:00.000-07:00

Love this song right now...

2009-09-01T16:37:00.001-07:00

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

2009-09-01T14:57:00.000-07:00

I actually really like this trailer. Or at least the first minute of it with the awesome Chemical Brothers song.

Regardless, there's little doubt about one thing - I don't think Chris Massoglia plays football. Notice the really awkward catch in front of the school.

A little piece of me died today...

2009-08-24T17:35:00.000-07:00

As Skins got set up at MTV.

WTF, does MTV even do scripted television!?

This is awesome

2009-08-14T12:17:00.000-07:00

Once again today in Mexico US soccer disappoints

2009-08-12T19:05:00.000-07:00

Can't stop listening to the new Phoenix song...

2009-08-12T19:04:00.001-07:00

Taylor Lautner makes us all look out of shape

2009-08-12T19:00:00.000-07:00

Taylor on bulking up:
“My body fat got so low that we actually needed to increase it. My trainer would be like, ‘Go have a huge milk shake just so I can get a thousand calories into your body.’”

David Mamet writing an Anne Frank biopic for Disney

2009-08-12T18:58:00.000-07:00

Anne Frank: "God fucking Nazi fucking damn Nazi fuckers damn fucking crazy fucking Nazis."

Disney: "Umm, I'm not sure Ann would say that, David."

David Mamet: "Why?"

Some more Frenchy magic - the trailer for PARIS

2009-08-06T08:55:00.001-07:00

Some great shots of a very magical city.

The Sign of the Apocalypse

2009-08-06T08:38:00.001-07:00

Ode to the D

2009-07-17T14:19:00.000-07:00

Public Enemies

2009-07-11T15:20:00.000-07:00

Shit movie, don't see it.

Not even going to bother to write about it...

U-S-A!

2009-06-25T14:16:00.000-07:00

The greatest victory in US Soccer?

USA 2 vs. Spain 0

Black Eyed Peas, I gotta feeling...

2009-06-25T13:57:00.001-07:00

I hate Boom Boom Pow, but I'm really digging this other Black Eyed Peas song, especially the beginning...

Robert Bly, on growing up

2009-06-25T12:33:00.000-07:00

"...All the great cultures except ours preserve and have lived with images of this positive energy.... We have been lifted up to what is great in us.... At twelve or fourteen, when fueled by sexual instinct, we rose or fell deeply in love, and knew that was good, very good. Later…we felt mental abilities and physical abilities in us that we had never even imagined.

Each of us had already guessed that we were sons of kings and queens, and somehow had landed mistakenly in our prosaic and dumb family. Our grandiosity then was already in us, even if (not) visible. We know the feeling of grandeur, and we want to have it all the time.

In order to keep the grandeur feeling a child may refuse to remember ugly facts of childhood, may look away from disorganization, abuse, abandonment, lack of protection, and skip over our parents' indifference, addictions, or dark side. Animals apparently don't have to worry so much about inflation, but we are human beings and a little bit of gold--or genius feelings--can send us into high altitudes, from which we don't want to descend. "

(500) Days of Summer

2009-06-25T09:01:00.001-07:00

I got to see the premiere of (500) Days of Summer last night and I have no hesitation in saying it's the best movie of the year so far.

The soundtrack's amazing, it's funny, it's smart and it's very, very touching.

Go see it.

Literary quote of the day...

2009-06-21T17:39:00.000-07:00

We shall not cease from exploration,
And the end of all our exploring will be
To arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.

-T.S. Elliot

Best tattoo ever?

2009-06-18T09:39:00.001-07:00

A strange way to try to let everyone know you took Honors English in 9th grade.

Really, Shia? A werewolf?

2009-06-18T09:28:00.000-07:00

"I had to give up scotch, because it turns me into a werewolf - and cigarettes, too. I seem to like to kiss trouble on the forehead and then try to back away. I test my limits quite often. I guess that's what 22-year-olds do. But I'm fallible and human and I'm figuring it out."

Best commercial on TV?

2009-06-09T11:04:00.000-07:00

Ithaka by C.P. Cavafy

2009-06-08T16:49:00.001-07:00

Reading by Sean Connery, music by the great Vangelis.

Listen to the words. It may be the greatest poem ever written.

Amazingly awesome movie trailer

2009-06-08T16:47:00.001-07:00

Make sure you make it to the end...

Sam Worthington as Perseus in Clash of the Titans

2009-06-02T11:49:00.001-07:00

Hilarious

2009-05-20T13:55:00.001-07:00

A great column

2009-05-20T11:34:00.000-07:00

This is specifically about writing, but I think the advice is pretty universal and inspiring.

Dear Cary,

I am at a crossroads, but any choice of road seems to lead somewhere I don't necessarily want to go. Here is my situation: I am 60. I have wanted to be a writer, specifically a novelist, since before I was a teenager. I struggled with this ambition because, I felt at least in the early days, I wasn't very good. I didn't sell a short story until I was in my 30s, and then to a "little magazine" for almost no money. Several years ago my "first novel" was published by a major house to good reviews and good local business; I learned just yesterday that 40 percent of the books remain unsold and the book will be remaindered at cost.
I gave up working outside the house 10 years ago because my wife has muscular dystrophy and I needed to stay home and care for her. This had a hugely negative impact on our finances, obviously, a shortfall I'd hoped to remedy through writing and selling books. Then, a few months ago I was diagnosed with cancer. Oh, not the "settle your affairs" kind of cancer, but the "treatment is going to change you forever" type that is like an echoing voice proclaiming my mortality.
I don't know what to do. If I write more books, they will probably just line up behind the others with my agent, or worse, sit in my closet, where my most recent book is stored. I am strangely not motivated about the cancer thing. Yes, I am meandering toward treatment, but, well, with less enthusiasm than fear normally provides. I find my thoughts drifting toward suicide, not serious contemplation, mind you, but consideration nonetheless. This latter thing is about purpose. I have lived my life for purpose, and I have reached a point where that purpose is becoming meaningless in an external, rewards-for-your-work kind of way.
So the question comes from a writer having a truly existential crisis. And Cary's response is brilliant. Here are a few choice pieces of wisdom:

Dear Lost,

I'm guessing that when you started out with dreams of being a writer, it wasn't unit sales that motivated you.

I say this because lifelong dreams arrive as dreams. That is their power. They have their own power and their own significance to us. It is the power and energy embodied in this vision that sustains us through the practical struggle that ensues. So when we feel, late in life, unable to summon the energy to pursue it any further, the place to look for that energy is in those original visions, desires and fantasies. That is where the motivational power is -- in the feeling we got when as a youth we set out to put our stamp on the world, to find our individual language, to paint our visions on freeway overpasses, to ignite passion in others, to blissfully hold suspended in our minds the worlds we envisioned, and to hear with unabated thrill the words that streamed through us like clear water streaming down the mountain.

The creative life is about such dreams. You now face serious medical and financial challenges, and increased unit sales would certainly help. But I wish to focus on your pursuit of writing as a personal quest. My hope is that by finding the strength to go on writing, you will also find hope and energy to conquer your other challenges.

But basically I believe your salvation lies in rediscovering the roots of your passion for writing. I suggest you begin a journey back to your creative roots. That is where your true, strong voice is. And that is what you need -- more than unit sales, more than awards, more than publishing contracts, what you need is your voice back. You need that fearless, questing voice of the adolescent in love with language and vision and story. Go back there. Do you have any of the first paperbacks you read? What might they be? James Bond? Sherlock Holmes? What comics did you cherish? Fantastic Four? Iron Man? Whatever those sources were, go back to them and try to re-create that wonderful, innocent thrill. Go back to them and reread them. Copy out passages longhand and feel their cadence again through your hand, through your pen. Let those early visions of heroes and villains fill your head again. Allow yourself the luxury of fantasizing again about being a famous writer. Write out these fantasies. Draw them. Make yourself a collage of images that represent your most cherished dreams. Use primary-process creativity to rekindle your excitement.

Remember the thrill of your own voice.

I love Cannes

2009-05-19T09:30:00.000-07:00

Literary quote of the day...

2009-05-15T09:45:00.000-07:00

"He was always doing that, making things up, trying to see how it all might fit into a legend. He didn't understand why he did this, because New Jersey was not a legend. It was the armpit of America, according to most people. Still he saw everything around him as a legend."

-The Lost Legends of New Jersey

Another gem from Kanye

2009-05-13T16:31:00.000-07:00

Kanye West on Twitter:

"I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER… WHY WOULD I USE TWITTER??? I ONLY BLOG 5 PERCENT OF WHAT I'M UP TO IN THE FIRST PLACE. I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME AND IF I'M NOT AND I'M JUST LAYING ON A BEACH I WOULDN'T TELL THE WORLD. EVERYTHING THAT TWITTER OFFERS I NEED LESS OF. THE PEOPLE AT TWITTER KNOW I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER SO FOR THEM TO ALLOW SOMEONE TO POSE AS ME AND ACCUMULATE OVER A MILLION NAMES IS IRRESPONSIBLE AND DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS. REPEAT… THE HEADS OF TWITTER KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE A TWITTER AND THEY HAVE TO KNOW WHICH ACCOUNTS HAVE HIGH ACTIVITY ON THEM. IT'S A FUCKING FARCE AND IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE. HEY TWITTER, TAKE THE SO CALLED KANYE WEST TWITTER DOWN NOW …. WHY? … BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!!"

This is talent

2009-05-12T22:47:00.000-07:00

This guy plays instruments, sings and is a star.

He should be the next American Idol.

Megan Fox on High School Musical

2009-05-12T18:38:00.000-07:00

"Let me tell you what it's really about. High School Musical is about this group of boys who are all being molested by the basketball coach, who is Zac Efron's dad. It's about them struggling to cope with this molestation. And they have these little girlfriends, who are their beards. Oh, and somehow there's music involved. You have to get stoned and watch it."

She's going to spin off this planet. I love it.

This site is hilarious...

2009-05-11T19:32:00.000-07:00

www.awkwardfamilyphotos.com

Call me crazy, but I think this looks amazing...

2009-05-08T14:18:00.000-07:00

I love hipsters

2009-05-05T17:28:00.001-07:00

This website is amazing. Enjoy this, one of my favorite pictures from it.

http://www.latfh.com/

The Jonas Brothers still suck

2009-04-22T14:03:00.000-07:00

Their new album cover is by far one of the stupidest things I have ever seen.

"Lines, vines and trying times."

What does that even mean?

My predictions for the Jonas' in the next couple years.

1) The youngest one will go solo.

2) The middle one will come out.

3) Everyone will forget about the oldest one.

New photo of the "Wolf Pack"

2009-04-22T12:45:00.000-07:00

From the Twilight sequel New Moon.

Do you remember how hard they were trying with that thirty second scene in Eragon where Ed Speleers didn't have his shirt on for no apparent reason?

This is trying like ten times harder than that.

I hate Twilight.

Russell Crowe as Robin Hood

2009-04-21T16:15:00.001-07:00

We've got our first image of Russell Crowe as Maximus, err Robin Hood.

Can't wait for the Ridley Scott/Russell Crowe/sword and sandal reteam.

Epic!

Chris Egan reads my blog

2009-04-20T11:30:00.000-07:00

I had this very insightful comment posted by "Anonymous."

wow... so I guess we could call you a fan of chris egan! maybe a little obsession?... I think you should take a good look at hollywood and the ups and downs of an actors life, Chris is only 24 and id say hes acomplished far more than most actors his own age in hollywood. maybe you should read up on other "successful" actors careers and take a look at there ups and downs. If we were all as cynical as you then there would be no such thing as a "life story"
I'm sorry, Chris. I wasn't trying to say that you were a failure, only that it's amazing how many things you've been in that have failed.

Poetry

2009-04-15T14:26:00.001-07:00

I am holding half an acre
Torn from the map of Michigan
And folded in this scrap of paper
Is the land I grew in

Think of every town you've lived in
Every room you lay your head
And what is it that you remember

Do you carry every sadness with you
Every hour your heart was broken
Every night the fear and darkness
Lay down with you

A man is walking on the highway
A woman stares out at the sea
And light is only now just breaking

So we carry every sadness with us
Every hour our hearts were broken
Every night the fear and darkness
Lay down with us

But I am holding half an acre
Torn from the map of Michigan
I am carrying this scrap of paper

That can crack the darkest sky wide open
Every burden taken from me
Every night my heart unfolding

The greatest sporting event in the world

2009-04-10T12:09:00.000-07:00

Chris Egan - Kiss of Death?

2009-04-09T12:58:00.000-07:00

With the recent relegation of Kings to the graveyard Saturday night timeslot and it's inevitable cancellation, let's take a moment to look at how many things Chris Egan has fucked up in a very short career.

1. He is cast in Eragon, a movie based on a huge book property intended as a franchise. The movie tanks and the franchise is over before it's begun.

2. He is cast in Virgin Territory, a period piece with a large budget starring Hayden Christensen, Mischa Barton and Tim Roth. Straight to DVD.

3. He starred in the Prince, a TV pilot which had an AMAZING script and Greg Berlanti producing. Didn't get picked up.

4. He guest starred in Everwood the season the show got cancelled.

5. The big budget ABC miniseries Empire? Tanked.

6. Vanished? Cancelled

7. Kings, one of the most expensive network shows ever ordered to series, just got cancelled 4 episodes in. The star? Chris Egan.

How many more chances does this kid get before people stop casting him?

One Shining Moment

2009-04-07T17:37:00.001-07:00

So it sucks that Michigan State lost, but it was almost worth it to see Tyler Hansbrough run to the Carolina bench when the game was over andthe only people that would return his high fives were the coaching staff, and even then it seemed more like obligation than exuberance.

Have fun in Europe, Psycho T. College basketball will not miss you.

The third Star Trek trailer is epic

2009-04-06T18:10:00.000-07:00

This weekend, whilst Cameron and I were crushing Natty's, we were hit by a thought of astounding purity and truth that can only come when crushing Natty's. And it's the very obvious comparison between the third Star Trek trailer and the trailer for Eragon.

Nero is Galbatorix. Both characters sit in the same location and scheme very evil schemes which are highlighted by their ridiculous lines/delivery.

Galbatorix: "I suffer without my stone. Do not, prolong, my suffering..." = Nero (with bizarre accent) "James T. Kirk was a great man. But that was a different life!"

This Star Trek trailer also contains one of the greatest lines in the history of movie trailers as Chris Pine, blood dripping from his face after a bar brawl, states in defiance, "Why you talkin' to me, man?" Classic and beautiful - the hero denying the journey.

If this post is too weird for you, I apologize. Trust me, it really does make perfect sense.

This is why I hate Entertainment Weekly

2009-03-31T09:58:00.000-07:00

Remember when I posted about how EW gave Slumdog Millionaire a B- and said it was awful and ennobled poverty and a bunch of other really weird shit back in November?

Well, in their infinite wisdom they've decided to give the DVD an A-. Can somebody explain that to me please?

Entertainment Weekly is nothing but a backwards barometer for pop culture. Instead of a magazine that finds the few good things that slip through the cracks and try to promote them, they so coward they have to wait for validation before they stick their necks out and promote something.

They went the opposite way as everyone else on Slumdog. I didn't agree with them but that's fine - all we have is our opinions. The least we can do is stick to them.

1. Friday Night Lights

2009-03-30T10:44:00.000-07:00

It's perfect. Everything about it's perfect.

Not only the best show on TV, it's one of the best stories ever put on film.

Friday Night Lights is uniquely American and a true masterpiece.

Bruno

2009-03-30T10:42:00.001-07:00

This is an awesome article from Defamer:

The MPAA's "no homo" rule strikes again! Sascha Baron Cohen's new mockumentary Bruno, in which he terrorizes straight men with flagrant gayness, has earned an NC-17, partly because of a scene depicting buttsex.

The Wrap reports that the film—in which Baron Cohen plays gay Austrian fashion correspondent Bruno who talks about doing ickies with other men—got the basically-banned-from-theaters rating because, in part, the character "appears to have anal sex with a man on camera. In another, the actor goes on a hunting trip and sneaks naked into the tent of one of the fellow hunters, an unsuspecting non-actor."

Baron Cohen's previous outing with Universal, Borat, initially earned an NC-17 as well, but was re-edited and got its coveted R. That film had a famous naked men wrestling sequence, though it wasn't as overtly homocentric as Bruno butt fucking or going on a talk show to discuss same-sex parenting, adopted black baby in tow. The notoriously homo and dick-phobic ratings board just can't abide that. Baron Cohen has appealed and the film will go back to the editing room to try and come up with a more palatable version.

Meanwhile the gratuitous tits of a movie not trying to say anything at all except "Straight men! Whoo!" like the abysmal College sail comfortably under the radar. Boys will be boys, not do them.

This movie is going to be hilarious.

Summer

2009-03-27T17:49:00.000-07:00

Where the Wild Things Are

2009-03-25T12:09:00.000-07:00

Pretty badass trailer, actually.

Neverending Story for a new generation?

No, this poster's not a joke

2009-03-20T10:11:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure what's worse - Robert Pattinson's moustache or the tagline.

I hope all the rapid Twilight fans out there enjoy Edward Cullen looking like a pedophilic Adolph Hitler.

And straight to DVD!

2. Skins

2009-03-18T19:22:00.000-07:00

I love this show. I love everything about it. The characters, the soundtrack, the location, the casting, the emotion, the realness.

It's fucking brilliant. It does everything right.

It's about the pains and joys of being young, a time when your friends are everything because they're all that you've got.

It also stands as a testament to everything that is wrong with American television and morality.

You owe it to yourself to watch this show.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

2009-03-17T10:24:00.000-07:00

From Dropkick Murphy's, the great Irish poets:

I play in a band, we're the best in the land
We're big in both Chelsea and France
I play one mean guitar and then score at the bar
There's a line of chicks waiting for their chance
So come on now honey, I'll make you feel pretty
These other gals mean nothing to me
Let's finish these drinks and be gone for the night
'Cause I'm more than a handful, you'll see

So kiss me, I'm shitfaced
I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown
in the trousers, she kissed me
And I only bought her one round

I can bench press a car, I'm an ex football star
with degrees from both Harvard and Yale
Girls just can't keep up, I'm a real love machine
I've had far better sex while in jail
I've designed the Sears Tower, I make two grand an hour
I cook the world's best duck flambe
I'll take the pick of the litter, girls jockey for me
I don't need these lines to get laid.

I'm a man of the night, a real ladies delight
See my figure was chiseled from stone
One more for the gal then I'll escort her home
Come last call, I'm never alone
I've a house on the hill with a red water bed
That puts Hugh Heffnor's mansion to shame
With girls by the pool and Italian sports cars
I'm just here in this dump for the game

Ahh, fuck it. Who am I shitting?

I'm a pitiful sight, and I ain't all that bright
I'm definitely not chiseled from stone
I'm a cheat and a liar, no woman's desire
I'll probably die cold and alone

But just give me a chance, 'cause deep down inside
I swear I got a big heart of gold
I'm a monogamous man, no more one night stands
Come on, honey, let me take you home

So kiss me, I'm shitfaced
I'm soaked, I'm soiled and brown
in the trousers, she kissed me
And I only bought her one round

KINGS, again

2009-03-16T19:43:00.001-07:00

A post about KINGS I found on Defamer. Contrary to me earlier derogatory post, I guess I kind of agree with this. I at least admire the show for being ambitious, even if it is misguided, heavy-handed and in places very poorly executed.

"If you felt a rush of orange light, pretty boys and butterflies last night, it wasn't spring knocking at your door. It was NBC's Kings, which despite its turgid premiere is a show worth saving.

For all of its pomp, circumstance, and instances of silly dialogue, it was a strangely enjoyable and beguiling two hours of pseudo-religious Bible retelling.

It's the story of King David, who defeated Goliath in battle and rose to precarious prominence in a kingdom where the rightful heir to the throne was a mincing gay fop named Jonathan. Jon is Jack in this reimagining, David is, well, David, a tawny farm boy who rescues Jack in battle by standing up to one of the enemy's Goliath tanks. He's celebrated as a hero by the people, and used as a pro-military PR tool by the scheming, conflicted King Silas (the terrific, scenery-devouring Ian McShane). So David heads to the capital city, Shiloh (a thinly-disguised New York—the Time Warner Center features prominently), and wide-eyes his way through all the fanfare—falling for the lovely politically-minded princess, enraging the jealous prince, and eventually staging a dramatic, gorgeously staged truce between his kingdom, Gilboa, and their bitter enemies, Gath.

The production values were outta sight (though, I doubt NBC can sustain that), the acting was solid (especially McShane and Susanna Thompson as his icy bride), and the whole alternate-reality conceit was respectably ambitious for network television. It's sort of a more Earth-bound, less intelligent Battlestar Galactica, with all its talk of religion and scheming, souring political machinations. Plus the people are pretty, swathed as they are in lush cinematography and slo-mo sequences of warfare and crown-bestowing butterflies.

The all-important gay stuff is causing quite a stir. You see, Prince Jack is both a lazy nogoodnik and a homosexualist, as we discover when he is viciously outed to us by his shamed papa (see clip). And isn't it a bit regressive and cruel to paint the only gay character as a jealous, petty, sneaky, cowardly little whiner? Plus, David and Jonathan totally did it in the Bible (see items 10-14), so why can't the show be true to that?

So it's a shame that a paltry six million people tuned in last night. Let's hope that NBC gives it a few more chances. We need shows that are this original and ambitious—as Battlestar winds down, as Lost plans to leave us in a year's time—even if they're a bit overheated and laughably melodramatic at times (see the Butterfly Crowning, all the way up top). I suggest you give it a watch."

Nicolas Cage on Knowing

2009-03-16T19:34:00.000-07:00

Nicolas Cage promoting his new movie KNOWING on Ryan Seacrest this morning.

RYAN: So, Nic, what do you think your best role to date has been?

NIC CAGE: You know Ryan, I really think it's this roll in Knowing. It's just really relevant.

I hate Nic Cage.

Narcissus

2009-03-16T11:44:00.000-07:00

The alchemist knew the legend of Narcissus, a youth who daily knelt beside a lake to contemplate his own beauty. He was so fascinated by himself that, one morning, he fell into the lake and drowned.

At the spot where he fell, a flower was born, which was called the narcissus. But this was not how the author of the book ended the story. He said that when Narcissus died, the Goddesses of the Forest appeared and found the lake, which had been fresh water, transformed into a lake of salty tears.

"Why do you weep?" the Goddesses asked.

"I weep for Narcissus," the lake replied.

"Ah, it is no surprise that you weep for Narcissus," they said, "for though we always pursued him in the forest, you alone could contemplate his beauty close at hand."

"But..... was Narcissus beautiful?" the lake asked.

"Who better than you to know that?" the Goddesses said in wonder, "After all, it was by your banks that he knelt each day to contemplate himself!!"

The lake was silent for some time. Finally it said:

"I weep for Narcissus, but I never noticed that Narcissus was beautiful. I weep because, each time he knelt beside my banks, I could see, in the depths of his eyes, my own beauty reflected."

KINGS

2009-03-16T11:38:00.000-07:00

I had really high expectations for this show and man were they crushed last night.

"If you want to be king you can't be as God made you!"

There were a million awful scenes and shit that just didn't make sense, and I think it fitting that the pilot concluded with the worst scene of all - a crown of butterflies on Chris Egan's head.

Puke.

Dancing!

2009-03-16T11:24:00.001-07:00

The Mysteries of Pittsburgh

2009-03-13T16:37:00.000-07:00

I'm not saying the book is a masterpiece, but there are certainly scenes in it that are masterpieces.

From the look of the trailer, it looks like it has stripped all of the heart, the poignancy from what made the flawed novel incredibly memorable if not nothing short of remarkable for a debut.

Call me a cynic, but I don't have high hopes for Rawson Marshall Thurber, last seen directing Dodgeball, being able to adapt the lyricism of Chabon.

Time will tell.

3. Freaks and Geeks

2009-03-12T17:59:00.000-07:00

All of the awkward moments from adolescence that you thought you'd forgot. Now you can relive them and it's hilarious.

This foray into the life of two teenagers from the Detroit suburbs was Judd Apatow's first big venture in the industry and it's still, for my money, his best.

Watch it, enjoy it, get pissed that it got canceled after it's first season.

The Tor

2009-03-08T13:26:00.000-07:00

Didn't see this coming...

2009-03-06T15:15:00.000-08:00

Keira Knightley has basically relegated herself to doing period pieces for some strange reason, and in a sordid, blatantly obviously attempt to try to throw a curveball at us comes THE EDGE OF LOVE.

Check out the trailer - it's a period piece, but (gasp!) she goes lesbian!

Can you smell the desperation?

I think Keira has officially hit the B list...

How trashy is Miley Cyrus?

2009-03-06T12:42:00.000-08:00

She jogs in cutoff jeans.

Great Pictures From Around the World...

2009-03-06T12:27:00.001-08:00

I've been thinking recently about how much I fucking love Harry Potter and miss it.

I'm ready for the next epic story of my lifetime.

How Dev Patel saved the Oscars

2009-03-05T17:19:00.000-08:00

He makes you believe.

Seeing him and the rest of the Slumdog Millionaire team at the Oscars and how excited they were, how genuinely happy they all were to be there, moved me as much as the film did.

Screw all the Hollywood politics, people that think they're entitled or owed something, people that are arrogant because they're insecure and can be. Dev Patel and Slumdog Millionaire is everything that's great about the industry.

More so even than the movies, they make you want to believe.

Quote of the day...

2009-03-04T19:29:00.000-08:00

"Out of every one hundred men, ten shouldn't even be there, eighty are just targets, nine are the real fighters, and we are lucky to have them, for they make the battle. Ah, but the one, one is a warrior, and he will bring the others back."

— Heraclitus

Hermione Granger goes to Yale!

2009-03-01T10:45:00.000-08:00

MGMT suing the French President!

2009-02-27T18:13:00.000-08:00

This is awesome - MGMT is suing Nicolas Sarkozy for using their song Kids during his campaign!

Sarkozy is the shit! He's dating a supermodel and's down with MGMT!

I love France.

2009-02-19T10:37:00.000-08:00

"I'd love to take a year off and travel the world under the radar. I would love to do it really low-key. I wouldn’t need to stay in fancy hotels or anything; I just want to explore - but I don't know how to do it."

-Zac Efron on coming out, err wanting to travel

Kanye's act is getting really old

2009-02-18T14:13:00.000-08:00

"Put this in the magazine: There's nothing more to be said about music. I'm the fucking end-all, be-all of music. I know what I'm doing. I did 808s in three weeks. I got it. It's on cruise control. . . . Man, we talked about music for God knows how long! Now let's talk about how my fucking sweater didn't come back right from Korea. That's what's interesting me."

-Kanye West in Details magazine

Great picture

2009-02-16T14:40:00.000-08:00

Two Heinekins and two Jeager bombs, broski!

4. Life As We Know It

2009-02-12T12:28:00.000-08:00

With most teen oriented programming being geared towards girls, this is the rare foray into the wildness that is the male psyche. No wonder it was cancelled after a single season...

It's full of hilarious cuts and talking heads as well as some moments that will make even the most die-hard high school haters a little nostalgic.

The Jonas Brothers suck

2009-02-12T12:22:00.000-08:00

First it's their purity rings. Now, apparently they have secret nicknames for each other.

Kevin is "K2," Joe is "Danger" and Nick is "Mr. President."

Can they get anymore more fucking annoying?

First the chastity thing, then pretending like they have artistic integrity when they don't even write their own music. Then Nick biffs the lyrics to a Stevie Wonder song while performing with him at the Grammys.

Worst rockstars EVER.

It makes me sick that I even posted about them.

Joaquin Phoenix on Letterman - Watch this!

2009-02-12T09:23:00.000-08:00

Is he acting or is he really that fucked up?

Inglorious Basterds is going to suck

2009-02-11T15:56:00.001-08:00

Ugh, Quentin Tarantino gone bad - the ugly side of final cut.

Song of the day

2009-02-11T11:52:00.001-08:00

Have been digging this song.

Thank you, Greek.

5. Jack & Bobby

2009-02-09T12:53:00.001-08:00

Take away the WB melodrama and cliche and the pilot (the story) is perfect.

A unique take on storytelling and a devastatingly powerful meditation on family, friends and how the way we grow up, who we meet and the choices we make, has everything to do with who we become.

Criminally underwatched and prematurely cancelled. Find it on DVD if you can.

Literary Quote of the Day...

2009-02-08T16:22:00.000-08:00

"On ne voit bien qu'avec le coeur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux."